I'm getting older. How do I know this? Well in my head I'm still 20 but my body is telling me differently. Nothing major yet but the backs gone again. It seems to happen more and more frequently nowadays and it makes me realise I'm not as young as I was.
Other things as well, the hair is growing out of my ears and nose faster than it is on my head. The hair on my head is receding faster than Id like it to and what hair there is, has now got a little bit more grey in it. It takes me longer to get up in the morning, and I need more sleep. I make a noise now when I stand up and I fall asleep in the afternoon when I get the chance.I'm moaning about the music in the charts and harking back to the good old days of music I never really liked the first time. I find new alternative comedy boring and I don't get Quintin Taranteno. I remember the original Karate Kid and Predator films. Christ I even remember Toy Story 1. I find youngsters arrogance annoying, it takes less to get me pissed, I get indigestion quicker and cant eat after 9pm or I'm up all night.
When did this happen? Did I suddenly wake up one morning and decide to be old? I don't remember that happening so how did I get like this? Its quite scary really. I'm closer to 40 than I want to be, Id rather be closer to 30. Then again would I?
For a start I wouldn't have all the kids Ive now got, I would have missed out on watching them grow up. I would have missed out on promotions or trying to achieve my dreams. I would still be insecure and worried about myself and trying to please and keep people happy that don't deserve it. I would have missed out on anniversary's with my wife and getting 10 minutes to ourselves. I would have longer to go on my mortgage and the lessons and experiences Ive had since. I would have missed out on maturing into, I hope a better father and husband than I was in my twenties. I'm not sure I would have more energy or that my back would be any better than it is now.
So taking all of this into consideration Id rather be where I am right now. Older than Id like to be but contented and enjoying watching my kids grow up. Enjoying my job and trying to achieve my dreams. Not quite yet an embarrassing dad and still quite cool in my kids eyes. Enough energy to chase them around and them not too old for bedtime stories. Still not too old for bedtime cuddles from the boys and kisses from the girls. Not having to worry about broken hearts for them or school exams.
I guess I'm right where I'm supposed to be, because I wasn't born to follow and Ill sleep when I'm dead. For now that's enough for me, happy, contented and living the dream. I may be getting older but do you know what it isn't all bad, I quite like it really.